Rude & Funny British place names

We have compiled a comprehensive list of the very best funny and rude British place names - see if you recognise them from anywhere!

When it comes to Britain, there is a surprising number of funny and rude places. For example, you have cock hill in London, Fanny barks in Durham, and one of our personal favourites, minge lane in Worcestershire. 

We imagine it’s quite a laugh for the local postman doing their rounds, no doubt discovering new and hilarious rude and funny UK place names - it’s the little things in life. However, we were curious as to what the most rude UK place names were, whether the award goes to a small village in Worcestershire or Cock bush avenue, also in London. So, to help answer our question, and to provide a good laugh, we’ve gathered together the ultimate list of rude and funny British place names, a mixture of old-timey English village and place names across the country.

Funny & Rude London street & place names

• Back Passage, London
• Mincing Lane, London
• Mudchute, London
• Percy Passage, London
• Swallow Passage, London
• Trump Street, London
• Cumming Street, London
• Cockfoster, London
• Dick Turpin Lane, London
• Cock Hill, London
• Titley Close, London
• Cockbush Avenue, London
• Dumb Womans Lane

Dumb Woman's Lane Greeting Card -  £2.99

There’s no better card for that woman in your life, whether spouse, mother, or grandmother than the dumb woman’s lane rude British place name card. Sure, it may seem a little harsh, but you’re guaranteed a laugh - just make sure they don’t take it to heart. Or you know, maybe they will. It’s a win, win?

Funny & Rude English village and place names

• Acock’s Green, Worcestershire, UK
• Babes Well, Durham, UK
• Bachelors Bump, Essex, UK
• Backside Lane, Oxfordshire
• Balls Green, Kent, England
• Balls Cross, WestSussex
• Bareleg Hill, Staffordshire, UK
• Barking, Essex
• Beaver Close, Surrey
• Bedlam Bottom, Hampshire, UK
• Beef Lane, Oxfordshire
• Beer, Devon, UK
• Beggars Bush, Sussex passed her prime
• Bell End near Lickey End
• Bishops Itchington, Staffs, UK
• Bitchfield, Lincolnshire
• Boggy Bottom, Abbots Langley, Herts, UK
• Booty Lane, NorthYorkshire
• Bottoms Fold, Lancashire
• Broadbottom, Cheshire, UK
• Brown Willy, Cornwall,UK
• Bushygap, Northumberland, UK
• Catholes, Cumbria
• Catsgore, Somerset, UK
• Charles Bottom, Devon, UK
• Clap Hill, village in Kent, UK
• Clay Bottom, Bristol, UK
• Cock Alley, Calow, UK
• Cock Bridge, Hope, Derbyshire, UK
• Cock Green, nr Braintree
• Cock Lane, Tutts Clump, Berkshire, UK
• Cock Law, Northumberland, UK
• Cock and Bell Lane, Suffolk
• Cockermouth, Cumbria
• Cockernhoe, nr Luton, UK
• Cocking, Midhurst, West Sussex, UK
• Cockintake, Staffordshire, UK
• Cockpit Hill, Derbyshire, UK
• Cockplay, Northumberland, UK
• Cocks, Cornwall
• Cockshoot Close, Oxfordshire
• Cockshot, Northumberland, UK
• Cockshutt Wood, Sheffield, UK
• Cockup Lake District, Cumbria. UK
• Coldwind, Cornwall, UK
• Crackington Haven, Cornwall, UK
• Crackpot, North Yorkshire, UK
• Crapstone, Devon
• Crotch Crescent, Oxford
• Deans Bottom, Kent, UK
• Devil’s Lapful, Northumberland, UK
• Dicks Mount, Suffolk
• Drinkstone, Suffolk, UK
• Faggot, Northumberland, UK
• Fanny Barks, Durham, UK
• Fanny Avenue, Derbyshire
• Fanny Hands Lane, Lincolnshire
• Feltham Close, Hampshire
• Feltwell, Norfolk
• Fingringhoe, Essex
• Flesh Shank, Northumberland, UK
• Friars Entry, Oxfordshire
• Fruitfall Cove, Cornwall, UK
• Fudgepack upon Humber, Humberside
• Gay Street, Sussex. UK

• Gays Hill, Cornwall, UK
• Giggleswick, Staincliffe, Nth. Yorkshire, UK
• Golden Balls, Oxfordshire, UK
• Gravelly Bottom Road, nr Langley Heath, Kent, UK
• Great Cockup & Little Cockup, hills in The Lake District, UK
• Great Horwood, Bucks, UK
• Great Tosson, Northumberland
• Grope Lane, Shropshire
• Hampton Gay, Oxfordshire, UK
• Happy Bottom, Dorset
• Helstone, Cornwall, UK
• Hole Bottom, Yorkshire, UK
• Hole of Horcum, North Yorkshire
• Holly Bush, Ledbury, Herefordshire, UK
• Honey Knob Hill, Wiltshire
• Honeypot Lane, Leicestershire
• Hooker Road, Norwich
• Horncastle, Linconshire
• Horneyman, Kent, UK
• Hornyold Road, Malvern Wells, UK
• Horwood, Devon, UK
• Jeffries Passage, Surrey
• Jolly’s Bottom, Cornwall, UK
• Juggs Close, EastSussex
• Knockerdown, Derbyshire, UK
• Lacock, Wiltshire
• Letch Lane, Bourton-on-the-Water, The Cotswolds, UK
• Lickar Moor, Northumberland, UK
• Lickers Lane, Merseyside
• Lickey End, Worcestershire, UK
• Lickfold, West Sussex
• Little Horwood, Bucks, UK
• Little Bushey Lane, Hertfordshire
• Loose Bottom, Lewes

Loose Bottom Greeting Card -  £2.99

Whether a personal joke or anecdote, Loose Bottom in Lewes makes for a hilarious and rude British place name greeting card. In fact, this card also makes for the perfect housewarming gift, perhaps paired with a bottle of wine, Tesco’s very own prosecco (very posh and perhaps the icing on the cake…), or a bouquet of flowers.

• Long Lover Lane, Halifax
• Lower Swell, Gloucestershire
• Menlove Avenue, Liverpool
• Minge Lane, Worcestershire
• Moisty Lane, Staffordshire
• Nether Wallop, Hampshire
• Nob End, South Lancashire, UK

Nob End Greeting Card -  £2.99

A former waste tip, Nob End, located in South Lancashire is one of the most popular and widely known funny and rude British place names in the UK. There’s no better card, whatever the occasion, for that nob end in your life, straight to the point and a slight bit funny. You also get to call them a nob end with an excuse, which perhaps you’ve been waiting to do for quite some time…

• Nork Rise, Surrey
• North Piddle, Worcestershire
• Ogle Close, Merseyside
• Old Sodbury, Gloucestershire
• Old Sodom Lane, Wiltshire
• Over Peover, Cheshire, UK
• Pant, Shropshire
• Penistone, Sth Yorkshire, UK
• Piddle River, Dorset, UK
• Pork Lane, Essex
• Pratt’s Bottom, Kent
• Prickwillow, Cambridgeshire
• Pump Alley, Middlesex
• Ram Alley, Wiltshire, UK
• Ramsbottom, Lancs, UK
• Rimswell, East Riding of Yorkshire
• Sandy Balls, Hampshire
• Scratchy Bottom, Dorset, UK
• Shaggs, Dorset, UK
• Shingaycum Wendy, Buckinghamshire
• Shitlingthorpe, Yorkshire, UK
• Shitterton, Dorset
• Shittington,, Bedfordshire, UK
• Six Mile Bottom, Cambridge, UK
• Slackbottom, Yorkshire, UK
• Slag Lane, Merseyside
• Slip End, Beds, UK
• Slippery Lane, Staffordshire
• Snatchup, Hertfordshire
• Spanker Lane, Derbyshire.
• Spitalin the Street, Lincolnshire
• Splatt, Cornwall, UK
• Staines, Surrey
• Stow cum Quy, Cambridgeshire, UK
• Swell, Somerset
• The Blind Fiddler, Cornwall, UK
• The Bush, Buckinghamshire
• The Furry, Cornwall
• The Knob, Oxfordshire
• Thong, Kent
• Tinkerbush Lane, Oxfordshire
• Titcomb, near Inkpen, Berkshire, UK
• Titlington Mount, Northumberland
• Titty Hill, Sussex, UK
• Titty Ho, Northamptonshire
• Tosside, Lancashire
• Turkey Cock Lane, Colchester, Essex, UK
• Ugley, Essex
• Upper Bleeding, Sussex, UK
• Upper Chute, Hampshire, UK
• Upper Dicker & Lower Dicker, East Sussex, UK
• Upperthong, West Riding, Yorkshire, UK
• Wash Dyke, Norfolk, UK
• Weedon Lois, Northampton
• Weedon, in the Parish of Hardwick, Buckinghamshire, UK
• Weeford, Staffordshire, UK
• Wet Rain, Yorkshire, UK
• Wetwang, East Yorkshire
• WhamBottomLane, Lancashire
• Wideopen, Newcastle, UK
• Willey, Warwickshire
• Winkle Street, Southampton
• Wormegay, Norfolk, UK
• Wyre Piddle, Worcestershire

Funny & Rude place names in Scotland

• Ardfork, Aberdeenshire
• Ardgay, Ross & Cromarty, UK
• Assloss, Ayrshire, Scotland
• Backside, Aberdeenshire, Scotland
• Backside, Banffshire, Scotland
• Ballownie, Angus, UK
• Blackdikes, Angus
• Bladda, Paisley
• Forest Dyke Road, Lanarkshire
• Boghead, Ayrshire
• Boysack, Angus, Scot.
• Brokenwind, Aberdeenshire
• Butt of Lewis, Hebrides, Scotland, UK
• Cock of Arran, Isle of Arran, Scotland, UK
• Cumloden Court, Dumfries and Galloway
• Dick Court, Lanarkshire
• East Breast, Inverclyde
• Fannyfield, Ross and Cromarty, UK
• Fattiehead, Banffshire, Scotland
• Hillo’ManyStanes, Scotland
• Inchbare, Angus, uk
• Inchinnan Drive, Renfrewshire
• Inchmore, Aberdeenshire
• Merkins Avenue, West Dumbartonshire
• Stripeside, Banffshire, UK
• Tarty, Aberdeenshire, Scotland, UK
• The Bastard, a mountain in Scotland, uk
• Twatt, Orkney

Twat Greeting Card -  £2.99

Off the northeastern coast of Scotland, you’ll find an archipelago named Twatt. When it comes to funny greeting cards, it’s difficult to beat the pure bluntness. An excellent choice of card for numerous occasions, whether moving home (off the northeastern coast or not), or maybe even a birthday. After all, it’s a reason to insult your best friend or family member, an opportunity that doesn’t come around all too often. Well, without any consequences, at the very least.

Funny & Rude place names in Wales

• Bullyhole Bottom, Monmouthshire, Wales, UK
• Cat’s Ash, Monmouthshire, Wales
• Pant-y-Felin Road, Swansea
• Penisarwaen, village in Gwynedd, UK
• Sodom, Flintshire, Wales, UK
• Splott, Cardiff, Wales
• St.Mellons, Cardiff
• Stop-and-Call, Pembrokeshire, UK
• Tarts Hill, Flintshire, Wales, UK
• Three Cocks, Breconshire, Wales, UK

The bottom line 

As you can see, there are countless laughs to be had in the UK, with many, many rude UK places names to keep you entertained. Whether you live up the road from backside lane in Oxfordshire or you’re more of a Bell End near Lickey End, there’s a joke to be had, and perhaps an extra reason to pack your bags for a quick visit. 

Don’t forget to check out our selection of funny British place name cards, as seen in this article - a card great for any occasion, whether a birthday, Christmas card, or if you’re feeling a little more adventurous and a slight bit brave, perhaps even a wedding.